Happy Mother's Day

This is the first Mother's Day without my mom.   Every Mother's Day from now on will always remind me that she is gone.  I will cry a little bit but today I wanted to really remember the good times and perhaps smile a little bit.  To make myself smile I remembered the best Mother's Day ever and I wasn't even a mother yet,  I was a little girl. Mom planned a trip in May that coincided with her birthday (May 14th) and Mother's Day.  So, mom, myself and a close family friend ventured to Hawaii.

My mom had everyday and every moment of the holiday strategically planned months before we left.  Hawaii has so much so to see. With only two and half weeks, well we couldn't see everything but we sure saw a lot, starting with the Iolani Palace, home to the Hawaiian monarchy.  Mom was royalist to the end, staying up for weddings, waiting for births and crying at deaths.  In fact, I don't know which was worse for her, Elvis' death or Princess Diana's.  So, as expected, first on the list was the palace.  Mom bought this hideous mu-mou for the tour.  When I told her she looked like grandma Agnes she refused to talk to me. Later a stranger on the tour complimented her on it, at which point she smiled and glared right at me with a "I told you so" look on her face.  After the tour she went and bought two more hideous mu-mou's, one for me.

The hideous mu-mou

We toured Pearl Harbour and the Dole Pineapple factory.  We attended a luau, ate poy and saw Don Ho live sing 'Tiny Bubbles'.  We spent days visiting every site from Limahuli Gardens (mom loved flowers) to the Volcanic National Park, where she frisked me to ensure I wasn't sneaking out a volcanic rock and bringing a curse upon our household.  There were days on the beaches and nights eating sea food and we even hiked the Kalalau trail.  It was a great trip and we were both sad when it was time to go home.

Of course when we returned everyone wanted to hear about the trip.  My favourite tale was the outrigger paddle with 6 other women.  It was a choppy day on the waters and the women weren't strong enough to paddle against the strong waves.  We struck a reef and gouged a large hole in the boat.  We slowly started bringing on water.  The guide signalled for help.  As we waited more and more water came in.  The guide kept assuring us that outriggers can't sink but all his explanations would not stop the panic from engrossing my mother.  Mom couldn't swim and it was the 70's so no one had a life jacket on.  She clung on to me for dear life and said "You can swim Lisa-Maire, don't let me drown, don't let me drown". I could not stop laughing.  She was in full blown panic.  We weren't more than half a mile from shore and there really wasn't that much water coming in but as each moment passed she kept panicking and I kept laughing.  When we safely got back to shore she said "There was nothing to laugh about " and I responded "Sorry mom, it was funny".

Mom had a favourite tale too.  We spent a day at the beach by the Manini-holo cave.  I was curious girl and wanted to explore the cave. Mom reluctantly came with me.  We ventured deeper and deeper into the cave and she was enjoyed it as much as I was.  There was still plenty of light and so we went even further into the cave. Suddenly this screeching creature with wings and claws was on my head and I screamed and I screamed and it screeched and it screeched and I ran to mom and yelled "Mom get it out, get it out!!". Mom was too busy laughing hysterically to help and eventually the Hoary bat broke free from my hair.  I was in tears but mom kept laughing.  I said "That's nothing to laugh about Mom" and mom said "Sorry Lisa-Marie, but it's funny".

The bat cave

What made the holiday so special, wasn't what we saw or did, though there were some great times.  It wasn't what we ate or who we met.  What made it special was my mom.  It was our first trip together and the first time I ever saw her, really saw her.  She wasn't angry or sad.  She wasn't busy or on the phone.  She was relaxed, she was smiling, she was happy.  Seeing my mom happy made me happy.  So on this first Mother's Day without her instead of tears, I will smile and think of that Happy Mother's Day.

Our last Mother's Day together.  No one is smiling.